(for Noelle)now? well, ache is a good term -
still aching inside,
why? distance, absence, hurts, loneliness,
facing up to these, and the aching for
what can't be faced up to.
yet, moments of solace transpire,
last night i opened the package that
held the book, your book, and then
i turned the light out, walked over
and lay down on the bed in near total
darkness, i held the book and all the words
to my chest, in the dark
wondering what dreams within,
what exorcisms might await,
what wisdom wants to speak,
what tears to be shared,
what shame to expose,
what hurts to let go,
i let it flow over me and through into
my heart, enfolded in darkness, only the nightlight
of the alarm clock face nearby in an otherwise blackened room
and those words clutched tightly to me
then turning on the lamp,
i began to read...
